what started it all

This is the post that i read that made me start blogging. it was like some wierd altar call to get me off of the back row and into the game. I was a seeker when i read this in August of 2006 on Carlos’ blog. it is now May of 2008 and i think that i am an Evangelist. Though i have been acting more like a believer and being in need of “redidicating” my life i thought it would be fun to share what started the dream and vision of www.lynseleanne.com.

Thank you to Carlos for writing this…for several reasons.

The Evangelists
These are the zealots. They preach blogging like Salvation may be found. They check their stats a few times a day. They blog multiple times a day. They convert one new blogger a day. A lunch will not be had without some pitch about blogging being able to change ones life. From the very core. They know more about your life than you do. They Digg everyday. They YouTube everyday. They comment on 20 blogs at a time in order to stay in the loop. They read blogs only in RSS readers. More than likely, they have had a marital argument about blogging. I am one of these.

The Believers
These are the blogging faithful. They believe that there is TRUE community in this stuff. They post almost everyday. They comment a lot. They try to grow their blogs. They try to actually have relationships. They pick up the phone and CALL other bloggers. They see the future of communication existing in a large way through blogs. Probably to their fault. But none the less, they blog. Their motto is, “Blogging is fun, Blogging is phat, Link to me, and I’ll link you back.”

The Seekers
These are the back row Baptists. They are blogging every couple of days. They look at the blogging believers like they are nuts. They play it safe and keep it pretty narrative in their posts. They wonder what is it about this blogosphere that can help them. They definitely don’t want to be like the Evangelists, but maybe becoming a believer wouldn’t be so bad. They READ blogs daily. Searching. For something. They feel involved when in “Blogging Conversations”. They don’t think blogging is fun. They still have a MySpace. It is almost a chore. But they blog.

The Lost
These are the ones who still ask…”Whats a Blog?”

The Atheists
These are the ones who feel persecuted by the bloggers. “Why must they (bloggers) ALWAYS talk about it? They must have watched You’ve Got Mail one too many times.” They will NEVER blog. They will NEVER read a blog. They make fun of all who do. They make me nervous.

what is the post or the blog that got you started?
for me it was Carlos at Ragamuffin Soul….

i’m a fake

Do you ever feel 100% fake?

like each day you get up one person and by the time you walk out the door you are someone else? you are fake, you talk different…and by the end of the day you realize that you have said things like “I will pray for you” or “God bless” and you know that you wont pray for them, and i am sure God will bless them, but i am not a “god blesser” kind of person.

that is how i feel right now. at the end of the day i feel fake.

right now i am a fake….are you?

the choice is yours

I am in the middle of a process. I hate “the process.”It takes too long for my liking.

But because the process grows and shapes me and my character I can handle it.

There are some things that have happened to me in the past that I have dealt with to the point that I could at the time, but I am dealing with these things at a more intimate level.

In the past when some of these things were on the forefront of my mind I let myself be down. I would let myself be depressed. I got into very unhealthy thought patterns and picked up unhealthy habits.

As I sit here in church Pastor Chris shared a verse from Deuteronomy. The main point is “now choose life”.

In this process I can choose to get down, or I can choose life. I can recognize that this process will give hope and joy to others.
I am encouraged to pursue this process, the pain and the triumph.

So choose life. Choose joy.

Does influence scare you?

Plain and simple,

does influence scare you?

why? why not?

which one is more important?

i have been thinking a lot. thinking about everything and anything. today my thoughts have revolved around spiritual and physical health.

honestly, i have neglected both in the past while. discipline is not a strong suit for me. unless i have exterior accountability i wont do it….but i have been thinking about the importance of both spiritual and physical health.

the bible says that you are to be “ready in season and out of season” meaning i should have spent time in the word. i need to be spending more time and focusing on my spiritual health.

and i have not worked out since i graduated 24/7 in 2006. i need to. i have not gained weight, but i am not healthy. i know it. i feel it.

so here is the question i pose to you….which is first that i need to work on.

physical or spiritual?

4 years

about 4 years ago i moved to Birmingham, AL.

on the outside i was excited. i couldnt wait to have a new adventure. but inside it was the lowest i have ever been. I had secrets, i was lying. i was living in darkness and looking at everyone around me that was living in light. which took me more into the darkness that i had created for myself.

the family i lived with was awesome. he was the prayer guy and his wife was so sweet. but inside i was dying.

There is this spot that i drove past every night on my way home. it is a sharp curve to the left and to the right, in the ditch there is a thick cement pole. each night as i would drive past this spot i would tell myself that the next time is when i would do it, i would wreck my car. i had unplugged my airbags and just needed the courage to not break or turn.

in hindsight, i am so glad that i didnt ever get the courage that i was praying for.

now each night as i drive home i drive past the same spot i smile.

last night on my drive home to my husband i saw this pole, and had no desire. i teared up with joy and sadness. joy because i was no longer there, and sadness because i know that there are so many people who are, and i know the deep, dark feelings that they feel.

i remember the feeling of “this will never get better. or no one would even notice or care if i did it.”

i am blessed that through the grace of God i spoke up about my secret….about my pain.

and 4 years on the other side i love my life. my excitement externally matches internally.

meetings…meetings….meetings

I am tired of meetings….and i still have 2 today..

and i have a new hair style that i want to share. now that i am married i am not needing to grow my hair out and have it “normal”….so i will change it. here is the most recent.

50 hour challenge

hop on over to Anne Jacksons blog for directions.

let me know here if you are going to give $10 for a net for a child.

a delicate balance

as many of you know i got married a little over 2 weeks ago. My wedding was my dream wedding…my groom was amazing.

It was a wonderful day. i could not ever want anything different, and at the same time i will never plan a wedding again, for me or anyone else.

I returned to work just in time for the ARC conference. 4 days of busy, 16 hour days…4 days of “i think i am married, yet i have not seen my husband since we got back from NYC.” But they were amazing days. there was something powerful in seeing pastors and staff members of churches receive from God and have an impacting meeting with God.

People tell you that marriage is a big transition. it is a big change from single life to married life. and i kind of didnt believe them. you are on cloud nine. everything is perfect. Chad has been amazing. i couldnt imagine being married to anyone else…..but being married is hard. we have not had any huge life altering arguments or conflict. it is just a transition. and i dont do change well.

it is hard to balance your job, your friends, your husband, and blogging. I come home at nights now and i dont get on the computer. I have someone at home that i want to spend time with. That i want to cook for (which if you know me you would be freaked out, cause i dont cook).

This is a hard and delicate balance that i am trying to learn. Working full time in ministry, blogging, friendships, personal time and husband time….and we work opposite hours….i work days, he works nights…i have Saturday off, he works.

In all of this i just ask for your grace and prayers if lynseleanne.com goes a few days without a post. I am trying to be a newlywed and learn my husband and learn how to be a wife.

It is not as easy as i thought it would be, but it has not been as hard as people made it out to be….but it is a transition, but a really really fun one.

fair weather christians

We were in New York City this past week….on our honeymoon. It was great! It was great to be away….it was great to relax….it was great to be married…it was just great.

Each night when we would be walking down Broadway back to our hotel there were these nicely dressed young men yelling. The first time i was a little concerned because we are in NYC and saw a few fights and some yelling matches, but as we neared them i got more and more irritated. As we got closer i could tell what they were yelling about. They were christians…they are yelling at the top of their lungs,

“are you tired of the alcohol?”
“are you tired of the divorce?”
“are you tired of the sex?”

they were out each night, except the night that it was raining.

which, at that point i looked at chad and said “they are the definition of a ‘fair weather christians.”

They were out yelling at me, telling me that i am going to hell…and they dont know me. I know that line sounded rather Jerry Springer, “YOU DONT KNOW ME!” but they didnt…and i wanted to make them aware of that. I didnt…but it irritates me when people write others off. you dont know. you have no idea if a person does or does not know God…you dont know where they are in their life.

They had no clue that i work at a church….that i love the LORD….that i pray….that i read my bible….that i go on missions…..they had no idea. and yet they were yelling at me and telling me i am going to hell.

I am in the midst of reading unChristian and it is rocking my world. It is challenging me in how i talk to people outside of the church. it is making me conscious of how i act and the things that i say.

Right now the church is being defined by those guys on Broadway the ones who have no idea….not by the day to day people who live and love and work hard to show that it is about the people.

What can we do to make a difference?

the honeymoon is over

The honeymoon is surely over!

no, chad and i did not get into a huge argument…we didnt event get into a fight. But i came back from the honeymoon and hit the ground running with work….

Yesterday morning was the drama of all drama. At 7am my Hog1000 light board decided that it was not going to work anymore. It wouldnt save the current show and then it died…and its fatal error message is “I’m sorry…I’ve croaked.” and that was at 7am…and our first service is 8am. Needless to say i work with a bunch of people who are networkers. we found someone in Birmingham who owns a board that was willing to let us use. so for the 9:30 service we were up and running with no issues.

But today starts the ARC:All Access conference at Church of the Highlands. It is going to be an awesome conference….but it means that i will be here all day every day for the next 3 days. I am so excited to get to meet some awesome people! but will probably be neglecting my husband. and i dont know how i feel about that.

but it is evident that the honeymoon is over…and we are back to real life. real busy life. back in my routine.

ready to be home

we are heading home today…brings new meaning to “the honeymoon is over” cause today it really is. we are sitting in the LaGuardia airport waiting on our 10:05 flight. We were supposed to fly out at 4:41 to Cincinnati and then get a connection to Birmingham and be home around 8….but when we got here our first flight was delayed…and we were going to miss our connection…so Delta booked us onto a 10:05 direct flight to Birmingham…so we have 4 more hours to wait at the airport….

our terminal has all we need….starbucks, chillis. i have a wireless card and we have each other ;). what more could we ask for?

oh….and i get to blog now….Chad said so.

here is how it went down

Hey! I am Lynse Stevens (not legally yet, but close enough :)).

As many of you know i got married on April 5th. I had the honour of Anne Jackson coming to the wedding and she agreed to twitter the events of the evening. They are kind of laid out weird…start at the bottom and work up.

So that is a quick run down of the wedding. It was such a great day for me! I was pretty relaxed until the cake lady….which turned out to be totally fine and amazing!

I am so glad that 4 months of planning paid off…it was great and an amazing day!

As people were arriving i started to get nervous….not cause i was getting married, cause i was/am really happy about that, but because i dont like being the center of attention and i was about to walk down the isle in front of nearly 300 people. Oh Lord!! But i did that and it ended up being really special.

Chad had this idea when we were not even planning “our wedding” but an “event.” That the significant women in my life who helped make me who i am and have poured into my life up until now would meet me mid isle and each hand me a flower that they chose to make my bouquet. It was so so special to me.

I had my bridesmaids
mom(s) (mine and Chads)
a friend through email and blogging who has been there through some times and prompted some conversations that needed to take place, Anne Jackson,
my mom in birmingham, Gina
my good (and newest friend), Mandy
my friend and “older sister”, Emily Cayne Rowe
my councelor and friend, Sommer
my prayer warrior, Maria
and my amazing friend, and an amazing listener Karol.

It was so meaningful….and i have an awesome bouquet.

It was so fun! It was a lot of work and we changed locations the Friday before and then the night before changed the ceremony to the same place as the reception….a HUGE warehouse.

Our awesome photographers, Zach and Jody Gray posted some of the pics, they are in a sideshow and if you would like to see them

click here.
Then on the left click on “portfolio” and then “latest” and we should be the first one that pops up…there is about 50 pictures or so.

Enjoy! More about our NYC trip soon.

down to the wire

Ok people, we are getting down to crunch time….and i am loving this! It is so fun. I am stressed, yes, but i seem to work well under stress…i wanted to take a minute and brag on my photographers.

They are a super cute couple from the Nashville area….Zach and Jody Gray. They are probably the most organized “artists” that i have met. They are so on the ball which is allowing me to not stress. I get friendly reminders of the info that they need.

All i am saying is that if you are needing a photographer i would highly recommend them. Just for the sheer fact that they are very professional.

Enjoying crunch time!

OH LORD…please help

Who would have thought that so much goes into a wedding….this is a picture of my next week…i realize that it is mostly in pencil, so you probably cant read it….but Lord, please help! And among all of those little things i have to do….i also have to work. But Saturday night i will be a married woman…and the happiest woman on earth! I wouldnt trade it for the world.